Splicing, Wikipedia defines splicing as “a modification of the nascent pre-messenger RNA (pre-mRNA) transcript in which introns are removed and exons are joined. For nuclear encoded genes, splicing takes place within the nucleus after or concurrently with transcription.”... now I don’t know what 85% of that means, but I am pretty sure that is how we ended up with the platypus… think about it. They have a duck bill and webbed feet (but still have claws), a beavertail, an otter body and fur, and to top it all off the males have venomous spines at the back of their feet. This is the majesty of splicing.

It is generally* accepted that splicing is the key to solving many of our worlds problems.

World hunger: by splicing Chickens (those adorable birds that taste like everything else) with Bacterias abaility to reproduce rapidly and asexualy, we would be able to feed the entire planet (or your favorite local bodybuilder for about a week).

Nuclear war: by splicing radiation resistance into the human genome from water bears we could significantly reduce the risk of humanity be destroyed in a global nuclear firework show.

Armed Conflict: wars are often won by whoever has the biggest stick. But I say nay. I say that wars are won by the side who has a raptor-headed polar bear-armed panther, with the brain of a dolphin, poisonous quills of the sea urchin, and hacking abilities courtesy of its electric eel genes meshing with cyborg enhancements.

Disease: It simple we combine a dash of smallpox, hemorrhagic fever, ebola, spanish influenza, polio, syphilis and, ….. oh you mean to eliminate disease… well I guess we could do that.

Increasing Population: please see Armed Conflict above.

energy crisis:


climate change

Sweepy Panda

* - generally being loosely defined