Authors - Stopes and Hoe

4th Year Students Quietly Panic About Inevitable Introduction into the Real World™

Frosh Week has just ended across Queen’s University campus, and the realization is slowly setting in on the residing students. No more “suns out, guns out”, no more “your pussy is wetter than the humidity”, no more drinking lukewarm Twisted Teas until you blackout in the bathroom at Ale. It’s time for the students to face the music and their decisions. Students are slowly coming to the realization that the fun, flirty, under thirty time of their lives is dead. RIP in peace #tbt at the Underground, you’re a mother fucking adult now and you have shitty responsibilities you need to deal with.

Things I can do now that I'm 21 and OLD AS FUCK

This marks my 3rd month as a 21 year old girl. #21andagirl. This is a list of stuff that I do as a fun, flirty, not-quite-30-still-in-my-20s, university attending gal.

Morley's Mug a Day 2015: The Madness Continues

For the 620 people who follow the adventure that is Morley’s Mug a Day 2015/2016 (formerly Morley’s Mug a Day 2015), 2015 was a wild ride. For those of you who missed the saga, a Kelowna, BC man spent each day of 2015 uploading a selfie with a new mug to Facebook, and updating his followers on his day to day life. If you weren’t one of Jon E.’s 7 friends on the page, you probably had no idea it even existed. I am here today to tell you that this page does exist, and that it is worth your time. I have even compiled a list to help convince you of this page’s worth to your life.

I’m Edgy and My Mom Agrees: A Quality Opinion Article

Yo, I’m out here trying to make an honest living and I just wanted to tell you guys that I’m edgy. Yep, you friggin’ heard me, I’m the edgiest edgy person I know. I have a nose piercing. Other girls might have nose piercings, but they aren’t edgy like me and my nose piercing. I’m a hardcore lady. I own 17 Nirvana shirts in varying shades of black because I love variety and Nirvana is the singer of my spirit. Nirvana was the edgiest man in the world, and I am #blessed to be basking in the shadow of his legacy. 

I'm Morally Obliged to Write an Article So Here It Is

I’m here. I’m writing an article. Typing on my computer, pounding HoCo hangover in time with my keys. I haven’t written anything in three weeks and the moral burden of slacking off is weighing on my conscience more than my desire to stay in bed puking today. So here I am. Just a shitty person writing a shitty article for the masses. The guy beside me is breathing really loudly, he’s really killing my writing mojo.I think he might actually be dying? I am slightly concerned about his health, but not enough to stop writing this article.

First Year Student Humiliated After Being Asked to Leave Party They Weren't Invited To

In a shocking turn of events, a first year student was asked to leave a party hosted in the University District, despite never receiving an invite to the allegedly closed event.

It’s Not a Cartoon, It’s ANIME

I am sick and tired of the normies in society constantly making this mistake, and I am here to make sure you understand the difference. On one hand you have cartoons - shittly drawn episodes with no plot or backbone to string the whole debacle together. They’re held up by stupid morals like “sharing is considerate” or “listen to your parents because they love you” or “capitalism is the backbone of society” and other fru-fru and fluffy crap that is meant to brainwash the youth of today. The world doesn’t need more dogs and boys on quests - it needs anime.

An Expert's Guide to Sleeping Together During Frosh Week

Orientation Week at Queen’s is the pinnacle of the university experience. Warm weather, cold drinks, and, most importantly, hot babes are all that’s on your mind, and you can’t wait until you hit up your first all ages event and bring the girl of your dreams back to your shitty dorm room. After your inevitable “Netflix and Chill” sesh, you’re going to want to invite your lady to spend the night at your place, because that’s what gentlemen do and there is absolutely zero chance you’re going to be able to walk her back to her place at this point.