Authors - The Prodigal Son

A Very Special and Saucy Set of Valentine's Day Horoscopes

Aries

Your red hot, sexual rampage will come to a grinding halt when a gypsy will put a curse rendering you sexually impotent. Why you ask? She did this on behalf of all of your vengeful ex lovers and you’re about to learn some wholesome life lessons. This month, look into community service and anti-hexes to reverse the curse. Also, you’ll fall in love with a platonic mundane looking friend after seeing them for who they actually are

Taurus