Okay Ladies and Gentlemen who are so alone it hurts sometimes, I am here to help. I’m sure you’ve read all sorts of articles about what to wear, how to style the rat’s nest that is your hair and all sorts of tips and tricks to finally, maybe for once, have a date on the biggest, most important holiday of the year. Obviously this is not working because you are single as shit, or there is something fundamentally wrong with you. I’ve got some new shit for you though. I’m going to briefly bring your attention to your most overlooked appendages.