How To Queen’s

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We’ve been at this school for what some people would say is an embarrassing amount of time. However, through all our muddling, we think we’ve learned a few tricks, and we’d like to pass these tips on to you. Here they are. You’re welcome.
The cheapest place to get pop and snacks on campus is the EngSoc Lounge in Clark Hall. (Pretend you’re going to the pub, but hang a right.) There’s free foosball, too!
If you’re looking to save money on textbooks, check the Bookstore Classifieds online. It’s under the “Used Books” tab.
If you make copies at the P&CC, just ask them to put it on the Diatribe account. They have no idea who actually works for Diatribe.
If you hate the Toronto Star, you can pick up a copy of the National Post in Goodes, and if you get to the Journal house early enough in the morning, you can pick up a copy of the Globe and Mail off their doorstep.
Try the Wok-In on Montreal St (by the strip club). This place is totally great, but their hours are wacky because it’s literally run by two people. Don’t bring the football team; it has a maximum capacity of 12 people.
John’s Deli, if it’s not burned down, is a great place to buy meats. They sell bacon in brown paper by the pound.
Opt-outable fees: Not nearly enough people take advantage of these. Don’t feel guilty for opting out, it’s your money; fifty cents can buy you a pop in EngSoc.
A lot of programs allow you access to their buildings after-hours. Take advantage of this. Many classrooms have DVD players, and you can hook up video games.
Get a BBQ. Even though you can only really use it for a few months of the year, it’s totally worth every pot you don’t have to clean.
It doesn’t matter how dirty, run-down, or bat infested the house is, live close to campus. Take it from a couple of pros who have lived NOP for two years. It sucks balls.
A lot of stuff may be broken in your house. Don’t try to fix it. Call your landlord. If that doesn’t work, go to the AMS Municipal Affairs Commissioner
Avoid Eng Phys and Electrical Engineering. They’re hard. Mining grads make mad coin. They don’t tell you this in first year.
If you’re lazy/a horrible cook, get a meal plan in upper years. Only eat at Leonard, unless it’s curly fry day at Ban Righ.
Steal soap dispensers and soap from the school. It’s so convenient. There’s no clean up! I’ve “heard” you can rip it straight off the wall with the help of two knives borrowed from Leonard cafeteria.
If the ThankQ people call, tell them you’re not graduating this year, or that you hate Queen’s.
Mac-Corry is a great place to cut through if it’s cold or raining.
On the second floor of Jeffrey is the Math Lounge. They have old comic books there. You can read them in class when it’s boring, just make sure to return them. Those math guys gamble like crazy in there, too.
If you didn’t bring your record player with you to school, but you’ve bought some records, you can listen to them on the third floor of Douglas. Their record selection sucks, so bring your own.
Never shave, it’s a waste of time.
Wear dark clothing, it hides stains.
You can put your sneakers in the wash. You think it’s not going to work, but it does. It’s like magic.
You don’t have to be an engineer to contribute to Golden Words. No matter what we do people only think it’s an Engineering paper. The majority of us aren’t in Engineering, okay?!
Move into a fourth year’s house. You’ll get free furniture.
Figure out what courses you’re going to be taking next year and go to the course web pages ahead of time. You can download solutions and midterm examples, that will definitely not be there the folowing year.
Get involved in something seriously. The only friends we have are in the paper, and they are only friendly in the hopes of getting content into the paper.
If you’re here in the summer, White Mountain Ice Cream is the greatest ice cream.
The Yellow and Blue Swedish fry truck. It’s so fucking good. They’ll pretty much make anything you want and it’s cheap and awesome. Their potato salad is fantastic and they’ll put it on everything.
Get a laptop. There is wifi in a lot of buildings now. It also makes moving hella easy, and you can bring it home over the holidays.
Start a club; there are so many resources available. You get free money, office space, and all sorts of other stuff.
Buy Tricolour tickets often and early. It’s a great deal but they sell out quickly around the holidays.

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